Miss New Burbage Taxi

A movie shoot on our frisbee golf course

Added 2005-11-30


Last night's round of frisbee golf will forever be remembered as the day we met Miss New Burbage Taxi.

The usual foursome started the front nine with a whopping tailwind but mild temps. When we got to the 7th hole, the star trailers that were there a week ago were still lined up in the Balmy Beach Club parking lot. (A star trailer gives movie stars a place to hang out when they're not actually on the set.) The first truck has this massive onboard diesel-powered generator, with thick cables to huge steel spikes driven into the ground around it, to provide electricity for heat and light for its own and several other trailers linked together. It had no doubt been running non-stop all week.

On the back nine, the wind was more of an adverse factor, but the trucks were a disaster. We all had to modify our tee shots on 12, and later Drew overshot the target and had to lay one up by shooting between a truck cab and its trailer.

On the 13th hole, that truck was right in the tee off area. Reg made up his own rules and teed off from some other fairway. Then I stood well back of the truck, but still within the legal tee off area, and proceeded to bounce my frisbee off a tree and under the trailer. Second shot had to go between the cab and trailer just like Drew, and out behind where Reg had shot from.

Then the trucks all started to move out. What a treat to see those behemoths make the turn at the intersection of Park and Willow Avenues. It seemed that there were a dozen people walking around with walkie-talkies and flashlights, coordinating the departure. From one of them, we learned that this had been a shoot for a series called Slings & Arrows. Then just as the last guys were leaving, up pulls a minivan with a decal on the side that says:

New Burbage
TAXI

And driving this "taxi" is the most stunningly attractive woman I have seen in a long time. A very long time.

It's obviously a not a real taxi, we could tell just by looking, and also by the fact that a fleet of star trailers has just pulled out in a well-organized manoeuvre, and Miss New Burbage Taxi has driven by to see how the evacuation was coming along, like a project manager or crew boss or something.

Now comes the funny part. See, at the 13th hole, we tee off from the street, and we'll often see a cab come down Willow to make the turn onto Park, and we always flag it down and ask, "Hey, how much to the airport?"

Sometimes the cabbie will just drive on, sometimes he'll say "What?" and we'll ask "How much for all four of us, to the airport, from here?" and he'll quote some number like fifty bucks, and then we always say "Naaah, forget it."

"Hey, how much to the airport?" has become one of our clichés.

So Miss New Burbage Taxi pulls up right in the intersection, and here's a bunch of grown men standing around with frisbees, late at night... and we all say, in unison, "Hey, how much to the airport?"

Miss New Burbage Taxi looks us all over, cracks just the hint of a smile, and says "You couldn't afford me" and drives off.

We were so stunned, none of us had a reply.

With the trucks gone, play resumed, Aubrey and Drew teed off as normal, and I ended up with a triple bogey on that hole. Waiting to tee off after the trucks had gone wouldn't've helped me much either, as Reg won the round by six strokes anyway.